isn't it so cliche how time and perspective can cloud our memories, blurring the lines into something warm and fuzzy? i miss the days of having all 3 of my kids just to me and to the occasional "playdate" which was more like a coffee date with toddlers. i miss the smushy mushy tiny newborn, asleep on my chest or in the crook of my arm all night. we could literally go for weeks without being around anyone but us. some days i want to just wrap us back up in that cocoon, or move somewhere and start all over again.
it's so easy to forget the sleepless nights, and sore boobs and jangled nerves everytime the baby cried. the feeling of desperate loneliness from not interacting with any other adults for days at a time, except my tired husband getting home at night after working all day and fielding my endless phone calls about how the baby (babies) wouldn't stop crying. missing weddings, reunions, cocktail parties and funerals because my little nuclear family was that all encompassing.
i feel like there's got to be a happy medium that i've been chasing. i'll let you know if i get there.
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